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Baltimore Kinetic Sculpture Race

Here's a Sculpture!

They give prizes, too?

Here are the amazing awards that have been given out since the beginning of Kinetic Racing in Baltimore. Read about 2004 and later awards in their galleries.

  1999 2000 2001 2002 2003
Golden Dinosaur
Awarded to either the first Sculpture to break down or to the most memorable breakdown. This award was created by Dr. Laurence Peter, who wrote The Peter Principle.
Bartmobile Sting Ray Bearded Nurses Scorpion (Bart) Kinetic Airways
Worst Honorable Mention
Lowest Award known to Humankind. This is given to the Sculpture whose half-baked theoretical “engineering” did not deter its Pilot(s) from the challenge of the race.
Dumpster Divers Dumpster Divers Golden Ram Scorpion (Bart) Visionary Virtual Vehicle
Next To Last
Awarded to the Sculpture and Pilot finishing, well, next to last. That way the end of the race can get pretty exciting.
Ruby Not Likely to Fly Kinetic Airways Rocket Ship G Hut
Golden Flipper
Awarded to the Sculpture with the most interesting water entry.
Bartmobile All Ducked Stingray Team Justice Road Boat
Best Pit Crew
Awarded and judged by various Officials, and has no real criteria (which reflects the wisdom of Pilots in choosing a pit crew, or conversely, the wisdom of some Pilots’ “friends” in volunteering to be the pit crew.)
Dumpster Divers Punxatawney Flyers Fifi DeVine The Duck
Best Costume
Awarded by the The Fashion Police who keep the criteria a closely-closeted secret.
Desolate Forest All Ducked Bass-Ak-Wards: Ladybug Hillbilly Art Mad Hatters
Pilots’ Choice
Awarded to the Pilot receiving the most votes from fellow Pilots.
Michael Yozell La Quan Michael Yozell/Eli Hess Eli Hess Shrimptastic: Brad Sweet
Best Bribes Dumpster Divers Dumpster Divers Dumpster Divers Dumpster Divers Mad Hatters
Sock Creature of the Universe Bartmobile Dumpster Divers Fish Finders: T. Pergola Frog Bumpo’s Gandhi
Spirit of the Founder
Granted by the Glorious Founder of the Kinetic Sculpture Race, Hobart Brown, who with his infinite wisdom and mysterious means known only to him, chooses the most worthy winner.
Westsiders Sting Ray Theresa Segreti Eli Hess Catholic Community School
Ace Pilots
The ACE Award is the most prestigious individual honor a racer can garner. This prize is a special hand-made medal (think Congressional Medal of Honor, Purple Heart, and Einstein Genius Knights of the Round Table Award). Many of the machines and pilots that race in other parts of the world do so only for this award and eschew any other glory or honors. A pilot who obtains this medal has conquered not only a race course, but his machine, and himself.
Michael Yozell Bob Buerger Dragon of Death
Beaver Bike/Jimbo H
People's Choice Fifi Bumpo
Best on Ice
Circumstances have permitted the ice portion of the race to be held only one year so far.  This award was given to the sculpture best able to traverse the frozen smoothness of the rink.
Speed Award
Awarded to the Sculpture and Pilot with the fastest elapsed course time after any time-penalty infractions have been added.
Desolate Forest Bo-Cycle Leaping Beavers Bull Dog Beaver Bike
Engineering Award
Awarded by the Engineering Judges. Category includes consideration of ingenious conquering of course obstacles through Sculpture design as well as any ingenious facet of the design that functions in a truly unique or Glorious Manner.
Hot Rod/Yozell Beach Rescue Black Velveteen De Vine Louie’s Bone Wagon
Art Award
Awarded by the Art Judges. Category includes consideration of color, costumes, two and three dimensional “artistic designs,” kinetic motion, humor, theatrical appeal, and mass crowd- and media glory-seeking.
Ruby Bearded Nurses Fifi Hillbilly Art Shrimptastic
Grand East Coast National Mediocre Champion
The Grand Overall East Coast Ace Champion must ACE the course. The award is determined by Mysterious Mathematical Means which include a point scoring system based on artistic merit, engineering prowess, and blinding speed of the Sculpture. The Sculpture with the highest average score in art, engineering, and speed is the Grand Champion.
Ruby Bartmobile Rock n Roll Huff N Puff Stinky Cheee Bedlam
The Baltimore Kinetic Sculpture Race is sponsored and run by the American Visionary Art Museum. is the volunteer work of Tom Jones.
If you have suggestions about making this site better, or questions, e-mail Tom at